SPONSORED: Ranking Disney Sorcerer’s Arena: Epic Alliances characters based on whether I could take them in a fight
It’s going down in the House of Mouse.
This article was sponsored by The Op Games, the studio behind Disney’s Sorcerer’s Arena: Epic Alliances. You can get the Sorcerer’s Arena: Epic Alliances - Core Set from Amazon UK and US, the Turning the Tide expansion can also be found on Amazon UK and US.
Disney and Pixar’s animated films are best known for the wholesome lessons they teach viewers, adorable animal sidekicks and catchy musical numbers. What they’re not remembered for are brutal brawls between beloved characters, but that’s exactly what the Disney Sorcerer’s Arena: Epic Alliances board game series is all about.
An asymmetrical card game that has players using their respective decks of cards and character abilities against their opponents, Sorcerer’s Arena is a tabletop adaptation of the mobile video game that pits characters from Disney and Piza’s past against one another. The Disney board game series features a core release called Epic Alliances, as well as several expansions including Turning the Tide and Thrills and Chills, which contain a roster of characters from Disney and Pixar films and shows.
What if say, I, was sucked into the board game and suddenly challenged to battle these iconic Disney characters? Let’s run with this bizarre thought experiment and rank all the characters featured in Sorcerer’s Arena: Epic Alliances Core Set based on whether I’d be able to take them in a fight or not.
8. Ariel
Nothing fishy going on here
Featuring some absolute bangers – who could resist singing Under the Sea and Kiss the Girl? - and perhaps one of the greatest villains in Disney’s entire lexicon with Ursula, The Little Mermaid is up there in terms of good Disney films.
However, its protagonist, Ariel, isn’t known for her combat capabilities. What little personality she has is primarily that of a kind-hearted, sweet young woman who enjoys nothing more than organising her collection of human memorabilia. Ariel is a skinny teenager who was willing to trade her voice for a couple of skinny legs – doesn’t exactly crack it as the most intimidating opponent. If this takes place on land, I’ve already won. If it’s in water, it might take a bit longer, but it’s still pretty much in the bag.
7. Dr Facilier
His friends are stuck on the other side
Dr Facilier was one of the best parts of The Princess and the Frog. His song, Friends on the Other Side, was a highlight and he *spoiler* squashed that annoying firefly character, so bravo. However, I am not a bug and am therefore a lot harder to squash.
Facilier doesn’t do much apart from turn one person, intentionally, and another person, accidentally, into a frog. To achieve this particular feat, Facilier has to call upon his spirit friends who, honestly, don’t seem like all that loyal to the doctor considering that *spoiler again* they’re the ones that end up causing his ultimate demise. It would be as easy as convincing those spirits that they’d get a better deal working with someone else for me to put an end to Dr Facilier.
6. Sorcerer’s Apprentice Mickey Mouse
He’d better wish upon a star
Obviously, Mickey Mouse is the big cheese of Disney. Not only is he the mascot of the entire Disney empire, but he’s also been in a lot of different Disney films, series, video games and more. That’s a whole wealth of experience. Nevertheless, this particular version of the mouse is the one that appears in Fantasia, specifically in the Sorcerer’s Apprentice suite.
I’ve not seen Fantasia in years. However, I do know that the Sorcerer’s Apprentice Mickey finds it very difficult to maintain magical control over a few mops and broomsticks. Sure, he’s got a stolen wand and a fetching hat, but he clearly doesn’t know how to use either all that well. Add this onto the fact that he’s possibly half my size and it’s not looking good for ol’ Mickey.
5. Aladdin
One step ahead of me
Now we get to the characters that could, quite possibly, beat me in a fight. Aladdin may be a street rat. But he’s a resourceful street rat. He’s a tad reliant on the help of the Genie to get where he needs to go, but he’s still able to *spoiler* defeat Jafar with just his wits and sick parkour skills.
What’s more is that Aladdin is a teenage boy who runs around a city, jumping from rooftops and sneaking around alleyways, whereas I'm not far off 30 and spend a lot more time sat at a desk. This street rat probably has one-upped on me when it comes to sheer physical capabilities. Nevertheless, Aladdin has also proven to be easily manipulated, so maybe I can use charms instead of strength to win.
4. Sully
An absolute monster
Sully from Monsters, Inc is undeniably wholesome. He’s fluffy, loves little children and is voiced by John Goodman – it all adds up. He’s also absolutely enormous. Sully’s sheer size and years of scare-training surely make him a formidable opponent, regardless of his kindly personality. Another thing to note is that Sully isn’t above violence, especially when it comes to protecting others. He has innate dad energy that powers his fury.
Nonetheless, Sully isn’t the brightest bulb and often relies on his companion, Mike Wazowski, to point things out for him. In a one-on-one fight, Sully has the bulk and the intimidation factor, no-one is denying that. However, catching him off guard might just be enough to take him down.
3. Demona
I’m ready to submit
Having not watched Gargoyles, I’ve not got first-hand experience of what Demona, one of the series’ central villains, is capable of. However, just by looking at her I can get a good idea of exactly how a fight with her might go. She’s a thousand-year-old flying she-demon with an intense hatred for humankind. I can’t really see a scenario where I’m going to come out on top with this one.
If I were also a gargoyle, or perhaps friends with one, then I might stand a chance. However, I am neither of those things. The best I can hope for really is that she takes pity on me and recruits me as one of her henchpeople to do her bidding.
2. Gaston
No-one fights like Gaston
Since watching Beauty and the Beast together, my friends and I have adopted the saying ‘barge-off’. It refers to when two ‘barges’ - a reference to Gaston’s line “I’m roughly the size of a barge” - try to intimidate one another with their sheer size and musculature. I am not and never will be classified as a barge. I just don’t have what it takes and I’ve never eaten five dozen eggs in a single day.
If Gaston and I ever fought, it would be less of a ‘barge-off’ and more of a ‘barge-out’ as he successfully punches me straight into the sun. I am no beast and I have not fallen in love with one – regardless of how hard I might have tried – meaning that my goose will most definitely be cooked, and eaten, by Gaston.
1. Maleficent
The mistress of all evil
You don’t earn a title like The Mistress of All Evil for doing nothing. Maleficent is my pick for the character I’d least be able to take in a fight because her reputation precedes her. She has her own actual, visible dark aura that enters the room before she does. She’s so bitter that she puts a curse on a baby because she wasn’t invited to a party. This is not someone you ever want to mess with.
That *spoiler* she was defeated by some guy and a few fairies is, frankly, insulting and should have been retconned – and kind of was in the live-action films – years ago. Maleficent has super, wicked sorcerer powers, can turn into a literal dragon and is immensely intimidating. If I knew I had to fight Maleficent, I would offer to turn myself into a little beetle and live under a rock for the rest of my life instead.
There we are - all the characters from Sorcerer’s Arena: Epic Alliances - Core Set ranked on whether I could take them in a fight.